Saturday, October 06, 2001

I've been thinking

Holy shit I've been thinking. Aight hold on while I try to contain myself. Holy shit motha fuckin thinking and shit........ahh ok.

So anyway, I've been thinking a lot about my two friends, ummm from here on out they'll be reffered to as Jeremy and Reagan. This story needs a flashback----flashback commensing--riiiiiiggghhhhhhttt now: so Jeremy and Reagan are really good friends and they've even managed to extend the friendship over state lines, which they thought, was just the coolest thing ever. One phone call though, almost proved too much for the bond. Jeremy was talkin about this house that he was building with Kansas Friend Charlie and how Jeremy's end of the deal was to make sure that the house wasn't built in a tornado zone. He said that at all costs he'd like to avoid the natural disaster that almost claimed both Kansas Friend Charlie and Jeremy's lives'.

Reagan, sitting helplessly on the other end of the phone and feelin truly guilty about the little things she takes for granted living in Michigan, offers Jeremy a trip out to California with her. Recalling the many stories Jeremy had told her about California and weekends at his summer cottage there, she thought it was a splendid idea. I mean, she really wanted to go to see her friend, she had had the idea in her head for a while and he needed a smile, right? He drew back from the phone cautiously. Jeremy whispered, "it's a long drive, the roads are horrible, it's windy as hell in some states, we don't have much money, and we could break down on the way. Trust me, it's happened before." Reagan was taken aback by his reply, like whoa (J).

But in quick response, Reagan said "it's not a big deal, we don't have to go. If it causes you this much extra worry it's not worth it." In her attempts to alleviate some of the apprehension in his voice, she managed to create an overwhelming awkwardness between them she didn't feel at all comfortable with. So she hung up with Jeremy and put his number away in a drawer.

This brings us to the last couple of days. Reagan hasn't spoken to him really and frankly I'm a little concerned. She told me she feels terrible about bringing about bad memories in Jeremy but and now this is where I was a little confused……

………….She said "I feel horrible about what he went through the first time on his trek to California, but I hate it when he compares the past with the future. How does he know that the drive will be the same?! But I guess if it worry's him that much it's not anything to lose sleep over. I guess I'm kinda disappointed that we won't take that trip out west together but it's not a big deal. At least we're still buddies and I'm happy with that. But…it must be said……if he ever changed his mind…….I'd be in my truck and on my way….no questions asked."

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