Tuesday, December 16, 2003

I rushed towards gate C48 and nabbed a couple of seats in front of the window before boarding flight 1296 to Detroit. I love the Denver airport, it's beautifully organized, so much so that it's almost poetic. Baggage claim and ticket counters are arranged in one building, the terminals are separated into 3 others, and they're all efficently connected by a short subway style train. It's so......shall we say marvelously "user-friendly"? Indeed. Even Denver's courtesy service between car rental stations is well organized, out of the way, and notably splendid. It's light years ahead of Detroit.......but I digress. As I sat down to read the paper and waited for the rest of the crew, I remembered to only save 4 other seats. My little brother, I thought for a moment, is becoming more and more estranged from this family.

Adam and I fought for the window seat as I chewed up two of my last 5 pieces of Dramamine. Ha! I won. Gazing out the cabin window, we both felt the uneasiness of what it meant to fly home. I was supposed to be happy, I was supposed to feel excited to get back to Christmas, Detroit, and school, but I wasn't. I got on the plane, sat down, and my brother said "Jack, I don't want to go home yet". I knew what he meant but I agreed with him not because I wanted stay on vacation, but because I didn't want to return to reality. I didn't want come home so that I could listen to people fight or rant about why they fight or even drunk people tell me "[you] can go fuck [yourself]". Who wants to come back to this? After spending a couple of days in snowy CO skiing - who the hell would want to fly into an ancient, chaotic airport, spend 45 minutes loading and unloading baggage, and drive 45 minutes back home only to hear conspiracy theories concerning a sibling's social or familial exchanges, arguments as to who's theory is right, and someone saying "well why don't you just go fuck yourself"??????? I want to go away - for more than four days this time....I don't want to deal with this.

In times like these, all I want to do is walk away. I'm tired of fighting. I'm tired of fucking politics.

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